The Paleo f(x) 2016 Gun Gallery!

The Paleo f(x) 2016 Gun Gallery!

Last weekend I attended Paleo f(x) for the first time.  Held in Austin, TX for the past five years, Paleo f(x) has firmly established itself as the definitive annual gathering for people interested in the ancestral health movement.  It attracts a Who’s Who of celebrated scientists, authors, athletes, biohackers and speakers who gather not only to learn and exchange ideas, but to chat, mingle and party.  Not to mention nibble and sip on the many amazing food and nutrition offerings brought to the conference by an amazing crowd of creative Paleo entrepreneurs.

So today I should really be writing about Chris Masterjohn’s incredible talk on sex hormones. I should be writing about the wonderful benefit dinner honoring the critical work of the Farm-to-Consumer Legal Defense Fund.  I should be writing about David Perlmutter’s insightful exploration of the gut microbiome, or Chris Kresser’s incredible new training program that is going to unleash hundreds of new (and desperately needed) functional practitioners across America very soon.

Instead, I’m writing about the guns.

I ordinarily do not spend overly much time thinking about the male physique.  In fact, I would go so far as to say I seriously do not care what a man’s muscles look like.  Generally, I’m all about that big pile of gray ramen noodles between the ears.

But, the caliber of physical fitness one is confronted with at Paleo f(x) cannot be ignored.  It is formidable.  Everywhere you turn, there are guns.  Some of these guns are cut within an inch of their life; others are just kinda solid, masculine arm-meat.  Either way, throw a stick at Paleo f(x) and chances are, you’re gonna hit a nice pair of guns.

So without further ado, allow me to present the Paleo f(x) 2016 Gun Gallery!


Rather than just offer these to you as a kind of photo essay pondering the physical manifestation of Paleo wellness principles (my original, tasteful idea), I thought why not have some fun.

These arms belong to some of the best and the brightest in the Paleo community.  So… can you match the guns in the picture to the Paleo expert they belong to?  Write your guess in the comments section below!

The first person to guess all nine correctly will win a Best of Paleo f(x) Bundle, featuring Nikki’s Coconut Butter, Jilz Gluten Free Crackerz, Ancient Nutrition Bone Broth Powder and EPIC Grass Fed Protein Bars.

The winning guess will also trigger a $250 donation from The Strong Woman to Steve’s Club.  Steve’s Club is an amazing not-for-profit that brings Paleo nutritional and fitness principles to at-risk youth in cities across America.  Kids touched by this charity can go to their local Steve’s Club after school, where they interact with positive members of the community while experiencing Crossfit, nutritional education and mentorship, rather than being exposed to drugs, gangs and violence.

Steve’s Club is doing a great job of making sure that the amazing things we learn and celebrate at a place like Paleo f(x) don’t just remain a cool experiment of middle class and upper middle-class health enthusiasts… but that people across all socio-economic strata can be exposed to these ideas, until they are woven into the fabric of everyday life.  As Michelle Norris – one of the founders of Paleo f(x) – poignantly noted during one of the talks, the person who doesn’t look like the picture-postcard of health is precisely the person we need to reach out to and welcome into the big, beautiful tent of ancestral health.

So let’s go!  Here are the names of the nine guys shown in the photo, listed in no particular order.

Thanks to all of them for being so game!


Write your guess in the comments below!

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  • Karin / 4 June, 2016

    Dear Heather, thank you for this hilarious post. I smiled and laughed out loud throughout the entire read. So fun and well written!

    Reply to Karin

  • Kristen Strate / 6 June, 2016

    1 Robb Wolf
    2 Aubrey Marcus
    3 Mark Dhamma
    4 Ben Greenfield
    5 Eric Till
    6 Abel James
    7 Tony Federico
    8 Mark Sisson
    9 Ken Tarr

    Love this by the way! 😉

    Reply to Kristen Strate

  • Thaddeus / 7 June, 2016

    Kristen, so close! I’ll try my hand at this. I competed against Ken and Ben in the Fitness Challenge, so I definitely know those two, and Sisson of course!!
    1 Abel James
    2 Aubrey Marcus
    3 Mark Dhamma
    4 Ben Greenfield
    5 Eric Till
    6 Ken Tarr
    7 Tony Federico
    8 Mark Sisson
    9 Rob Wolf

    Reply to Thaddeus

      • Thaddeus / 15 June, 2016

        Wow. Yay! Thanks Heather!! That was fun. It helps I competed against some of those guns, and got to shake many of their hands over the three days. Or maybe I pay more attention to these things than I should….

        Reply to Thaddeus

  • Heather Owen / 8 June, 2016

    Hilarious! Love it!! It was nice to meet you at Paleo Fx :)

    Reply to Heather Owen